Friday, May 4, 2012

The 0's and 1's Theory of Corporate Management


Computers store information in memory using clumps of silicone to represent numbers. If you were able to look close enough on a memory chip, you'd see pieces of silicone that were holding either positive or negative charges.

Think of the positive as '1' and the negative as '0.' So the number "12" looks like “1100.” The ones and zeros are assigned values from right to left as “128 64 32 16 8 4 2 1”

So, 1 1 0 0
       8 4 2 1

means '12' which is is '8 + 4'

You'll hear jargon about Microsoft Win7 being "64bit" as opposed to other systems being "32bit" and "16bit." That is how many pieces of silicone count as one clump.

Consider a "16 bit register," which is a clump of silicone divided into 16 pieces (or bits).

This register:

0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
has no value, but this one:

1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1
has maximum value (65535)

*******************************************************************
AS APPLIES TO MANAGEMENT.

Think of a register as being a series of thin (1) and fat (0) people. The 1's are productive. The 0's are political. There are only 16 places where a person can stand. Any extras fall off the platform. You "shift" other people off the platform (to the right) when making room for a new person, or simply replace the 1 with a 0.

So, 8 bits (people) where only one is a 1:
00000100 the value of the company is '4'
shift left (a promotion):
00001000 the value is '8'
shift right (a demotion):
00000010 the value is '2'

In the last example, the 1 was bumped to the right when the 0 was squeezed into its place, and the value of the company became lower.

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Think of Corporate organizations as being like computer registers. They are a mix of 0's and 1's that at any time represent the value of the organization. Too many 0's and the organization has low value. A majority of 1's means the organization has high value. 1's increase value, and 0's decrease value.

So, managers and co-workers increase overall value if they are 1's and decrease overall value if they are 0's. 1's can become 0's, but the opposite is impossible.

Consider this brand new entrepreneurial organization – E. It has all 1's working for it.

1111111111111111 E is worth 65535.

One day, a 1 leaves for some reason, but a 0 replaces it.

1111111111111110 Now E is worth 65534.

Not much of a difference. But, the 0 has political influence, so it gets promoted, moved to the left, but the 1 that was there is shifted to the right.

1111111111111101 Now E is worth 65533. E lost value.

Pretty cool for the 0. Lets promote it again:

1111111111111011 Now E is worth 65531.

But look!! It's still a 16 bit register (which is pretty impressive). It still has 16 pieces of silicone in it!! But, the value is less.

The founding members start to leave, but they are replaced not by 1's but by other 0's . Watch:

1101011111111011 Now E is worth 55291 – it lost 10240!!

Wow – replacing those 1's with 0's in the upper part had a really big impact!!

In the real world, 0's attract other 0's because 1's are embarrassing. 1's make 0's look stupid so the 0's become uncomfortable. They move to the upper floor or set up offices for 0's and cubes for1's

0's promote 0's and hire new 0's, especially in the upper ranks. So, watch what happens:

1100101111111101 Now E is worth 52221
1100100111111110 Now E is worth 51710
1100100111101111 Now E is worth 51695
1100100110110111 Now E is worth 51639

Did you notice? When a 0 is promoted or hired, it bumps all the other people to the right and they fall off the register.

Let's talk about a takeover where the first bit (the CEO, who knows the business and is still kind of a 1) is replaced with an accountant.

0100100110110111 Now E is only worth 18871

Wow!! Putting a loser (and 0's are losers) as a CEO has a huge impact on the company value!!! The stock price is going down!! Must be the CFO's fault; replace the CFO!! The CEO-0 hires his friend, another 0.

0000100110110111 Now E is only 2487

Remember, 0's attract other 0's. They never hire 1's. Watch what happens as the pattern of newly hired and promoted 0's continues to push the 1's off the right:

0000100110110111 2487
0000100011011011 2267
0000100001101101 2157
0000100001101100 2156
0000100001101010 2154
0000010000110101 1077
0000010000101010 1066
0000010000010101 1045
0000010000010100 1044

Now the last (demoted) lower level VP that at least had a clue quits, is replaced with a 0, and life continues on until there's no value left.

0000000000001010 10
0000000000000101 5
0000000000000001 1
0000000000000000 0

But whoa!!! E is a 16 bit register (*** A 16 BIT REGISTER *** That's a LOT OF BITS!!!) That is still very impressive. But E is now valueless.

******************************************************************

HOW DO YOU RECOGNIZE IF A MANAGER IS A ZERO?

Simple -- ask yourself:

If some mini-rapture occurred, and the manager suddenly disappeared off the face of the earth leaving no trace -- would it matter?
Would it make a difference?
Would anyone notice?

If the answer is no difference, the manager is a 0, and you're organization is doomed.


1 comment:

Unknown said...

Seriously brilliant!